So lets talk about libido.
Even I’m confused that this is even a topic I have to talk about. But, the more I started asking people about it, the more I realised it’s a thing. boys and girl, millennial’s, us, in our 20’s and 30’s, experience phases of low or no sex drive.
And I’m not talking about not being in the mood every now and then, I’m talking about how because of our lifestyle and our behaviours, we’re not down.
We’re too tired. We’re disconnected. We’re not communicating. We’re stressed. We’re busy. We’re unhappy.
Sometimes it’s biological - medications are impacting our sex drive, the pill is impacting our sex drive, taking drugs and drinking is impacting our sex drive, not enough sleep’s impacting our sex drive, poor diet’s impacting our sex drive, non-optimal detox pathways are impacting our sex drive.
Other times, it’s emotional and psychological. Stress is impacting our sex drive, our wellbeing’s impacting our sex drive, our mental health’s impacting our sex drive, our self-love’s impacting our sex drive, our relationships impacting our sex drive, our work’s impacting our sex drive, over-thinking impacts our sex drive.
Other times, it’s spiritual. We’re not feeling loved, connected, supported, protected, so that communication between sex drive and our physical body are disconnected. And we’re just not down for it.
Our sex drive is often referred to the “canary in the coal mine” analolgy. It’s the first thing to go when we’re out of balance, both mentally and physically.
So, let’s start with stress.
Stress puts our body into fight or flight mode – into our sympathetic nervous system.
We’re freeing up glucose, our heart rate increases, our blood vessels constrict, and we’re alert. We’re tense. We’re in survival mode. And guess what. Pretend (or intentional) baby making and lusty great sex, isn’t high on your bodies priorities when it thinks there’s a threat around.
Our reproductive system goes offline. Semen is metabolically expensive. Our bloods going to our vital organs, not our reproductive ones. Like we’re not thinking about sex.
I feel it’s also important to add a note that some of us, are just more primal and sexually driven, others aren’t. This blog and episode just aims to address underlying reasons for why, you’ve noticed a decrease or dead sex drive.
And a lot of us are chronically stressed. We’re stressed for all sorts of external and internal reasons. Some we can’t really control, like junk light, environmental pollutants, metallic by-products, and others, we kinda can - by making lifestyle and mindset moves to decrease it’s sapping control it has over us.
We’re talking about movement – both physically and emotionally (e.g training vs journaling), magnesium supplementation / baths, float pods, removing the stress, strengthening our mindset to be able to step away from the stress and remove its power it has over us, like living in abundance, embracing challenges, manifesting, affirmations, all that awesome “woo woo” shit.
Next, being physically unhealthy, will reduce our sex drive. Being over weight, obese and insulin resistant lowers testosterone in both men and women, reducing sex drive.
Exercise boosts not only testosterone in both men and women, but also improves circulation, decreases stress, releases endorphins and thus, increases libido
Not eating enough plant foods rich in vitamins and minerals means our synthesis of hormones and neurotransmitters are compromised. Both of which we require to get us in the mood.
Junk light, like blue light from our Iphones decreases the amount of luteinising hormone that’s produces, and luteinising hormone primes our ovaries and testes to make sex hormones.
So reducing exposure to junk light and blue light, wamring up our environments with warmer coloured globes, and f.lux-ing our laptops and phones.
Shit sleep also decreases our sex drive. Because again, sex hormones are produced during sleep. So is human growth hormone.
Also not getting enough sunlight to regulate our wake-sleep cycle, negatively impacts our bodies homeostasis and can lead to additional imbalance and low grade chronic inflammation.
Anti-depressants (such as SSRI’s) and anxiety medications (e.g Benzodiazepins) also lower our sex drive. They interrupt our neurotransmitter balance and this can impact our desire to get it on.
Weight loss and low fat diets – not enough nutrients and good fats to synthesise our sex hormones, also lower our sex drive. Again, because we’re in more of a sympathetic stress mode, and our body knows we don’t have enough nutrients to make epic babies, so libido dips.
Birth control, in all forms, plays with our hormones and when we cycle off it, destroys our sex drive, and our hormones and can leave us with a desert and zero drive.
Same goes for SARMs (selective androgen receptor modulators) and cycles of steroids, whether required medically to reduce inflammation or for da gains.
Smoking decreases blood flow, which can dull feeling things down there. Yikes.
Having our body, physically unaligned, due to movement patterns also impacts our sex drive. With all our nerves connected to not only our peripheral limbs, but also our brain and mind.
Self-esteem, body confidence and body language, can also decrease our sex drive.
Feeling disconnected decreases our sex drive (maybe more so girls than men, because of how we’re wired), but feeling distant from our partner/s can reduce our sexual desire
To finish off this episode, a few reasons why we should care about our libido and why sex is awesome for our health (if you need a reason haha).
Sex has a healing ability I feel. Energetically. It’s just freeing and releases a tonne of feel-good endorphins and hormones its hard not to love it, so this can boost our mood, mental state and strengthen feelings of connection and love.
Sex has the ability to lower blood pressure, reduce inflammation, boosts our immune system, is also exercise and I don’t feel I need to even explain how beneficial movement is, can actually reduce and blunt pain?!
Easy additions to boost libido,
Besides getting to the root cause of the blockage (all pun’s intended), like if you’re stressed, lets work on strengthening and supporting your adrenals – I love adaptogenic herbs such as Withania and Rhodiola, - medicinal mushrooms like Reishi, nutrients to support the adrenals and nervous system, such as magnesium and B6,
Adding in hormone boosting / balancing / libido giving adaptogens such as; Cordyceps mushrooms, Maca powder, Shilajit, Pine Pollen, Nettle Root, (get your 10% off Teelixiri’s adaptogens using themillennialnutritionist code YAY)
Vasodilators, such as beetroot and cacao.
If it’s more emotional, dive in, explore why you’re feeling those feels. And communicate with your sexual partner/s if there’s something you feel isn’t happening. Whether its intimacy, after-care, etc.
The end xxxxx