how to cultivate the wellness mindset and eliminate the victim mentality


I need to address this victim mentality, that sneakily seeps into our daily lives. It’s all around us. We’ve been coddled (lol what a word) to accept that things happen to us, not for us. And I’m here to burst that bubble.

After reading Extreme Ownership so many ideas bubbled in my brain and realisations and like “holy fuck yes” and I started to recognise not only in my own life, but those around me, how so many us play the blame game.

If you’re not happy, in any sense, or way or form. That’s your fault. That’s on you. You can’t blame the external, because you’re the only person responsible for being where you are. You don’t like you job, that’s your fault. Not your bosses. You don’t like your relationship, that’s your fault. Not your partners. You entered into it, you set the standard. You don’t like your money situation, that’s your fault. Demand more of yourself to get more money. You don’t like your body, that’s your fault. Not your parents or genetics. You don’t like how you feel, that’s your fault. You're in control of what you put in your body, what you think, and you determine what comes out. And so I feel all these themes interconnect.aka FLIP THAT MINDSET. 

We’re conditioned since we’re kids to accept things just as they are, that we don’t get to control everything, and most of us either get stuck, hit a wall, or just consistently live in a rut. “Same shit different day”. But its like why. Why is it the same shit, different day. Why aren’t you moving forward? Is it because you’re fearful of actually doing something outside your comfort zone, that will disrupt this same shit? Is it because you’re conditioned to just accept and play the victim, that you don’t think you’ll get more? That you cbf? Are you self sabotaging, with things like procrastination? That “nothing’s really bad, its just okay”?. All of these a) scream - VICTIM MENTAILITY & b) TAKE OWNERSHIP. Like wherever you are, however you feel, think, move, behave, or what you believe, is in your control.  

This ownership and realisation, that we’re in control of our health and of our circumstnaces is awesome, so lets stop and shimmy in it and be like YAY.

So if you’ve been acting like a victim, complaining, whingeing, stop for fucks sake. Empower yourself, or utilise books, individuals and movies, and other mediums to empower yourself. Draw power, motivation and inspiration from these places. 

You can get yourself to where you want to be. You can help yourself heal. You need to just believe so, and then execute on the steps to make it come to life.

There’s so many examples of the power of placebo, and this plays out in our lives every day, on differing scales. I feel I just want to tell every single one of you reading, YOU HAVE THE POWER. You have all the goodness and ability and magic inside of you, it’s just about tapping into it and being like “oh yeah”. 

Like as much as environment, genes, activities, habits, definitely, without a doubt, impact our health and whether we thrive or just survive, so does our thoughts. What we think and thus, command of ourselves will come true.

This links into the law of attraction, the power of the subconscious, affirmations, manifestations, and all of those incredible tools we’re able to utilise to thrive. 

Aubrey Marcus said ‘We’ve been told we’re faulty machines” in his podcast (episode 146 of the Aubrey Marcus Podcast). 

For us millennials, we’ve grown up fearful/expecting of disease. We’ve watched our loved ones, get sick, die, survive, relapse, struggle to feel amazing, slaved to pharmaceuticals, or hey maybe some of us have seen the opposite. Thriving loved ones, free from illness or disease, and yet, the media perpetuates the fear of disease, of illness.

This looming cloud that’s destined to catch up to us as we age, that we too are "eventually" going to get sick. And that’s all fucking bullshit.

Yes there’s degrees of hereditary illness’ and diseases, but I’m not talking about this, so I don’t mean to offend anyone. I’m talking about those of us who’se loved ones have been struck down with behaviour related, Western disease – cancer, T2D, obesity, high blood pressure, high trigylicerides, heart disease, stroke etc. 

We’re not destined to get cancer. Like there is zero trace of this idea in my mind, even though my own mum died from a random aggressive brain tumour. Just because she did. Doesn’t mean I’m automatically going to. I'm not a victim to this mentality, thats perpetuted by the media and our victim-rich society.

And so i want to communicate that our thoughts are so damn powerful regarding our wellness. There’s so many studies about the placebo and even the nocebo, (I’ve attached a few tedx talk’s below which go into the placebo effect, and is actually super crazy interesting), and often something a lot of us either don’t give time to believe (whether this is our own disbelief that something as common as thoughts can be so powerful, because that indeed would shift and challenge our entire paradigm and way of thinking. OR / AND because of the way we’ve been marketed and advertised too for so long, that we need to consume, to improve. That taking an external substance or participating in an external act, will indeed improve our health and wellbeing).

So I feel we need to treat our brain, our thoughts, like we treat our physical body. We need to work it, nurture it and respect it.

Feed it with belief, faith, love, reassurance, safety, and g times. Not with fear, inevitability, collapsing to the level of society, in the statistics which are always flashed around - e.g how this generation will live shorter lives than our parents, for the first time in history. But its like, okay says who? If you say so. Sure. But what if we attune our thoughts to a higher standard? That we’re immune to these diseases and western fates? That we’re not one of these statistics? That we’re the outliers. The sneaky excellent thriving millennials, living our best lives, going after our dreams, being of service and changing the world. Like that’s what’s up. And that’s what I want us to be.

Thats the end of my thoughts.